June 9, 2016

I sit here looking out at the beautiful Lake Quannapowitt, I am trying to come to terms with the idea of change. A year ago, I convinced myself that my life had all that it needed. I was satisfied with my college major, my personal relationship, the way I handled friendships, and how I viewed myself as a whole. I’m not a huge fan of change and this is where I hit my low point. Things were falling apart, but it was all because I refused to stand up for myself and make the decision to let go of the small things.

I sit here and reflect on that short period of sadness and confusion. I realized I didn’t give myself enough credit. I let people control my life just because they knew how scared I was in that moment. I played an ignorant role, instead of opening my eyes to notice the difference between the good and the bad. I grew tired of the same routine of being used as an outlet for others to prove themselves to be greater. So then I made a decision. I kept an open mind to my choices. I began making a conscious effort to either hold onto meaningful friendships and even repair the ones I knew I might have let fall apart along the way. I detected the difference between genuine bond and fake association. This allowed me to determine who was in my life for a true friendship/relationship, not just for other petty reasons.

A year later, I can say that those moments have increased my appreciation for those who guide and love me, even during a time when I was stuck between feeling lost but also feeling complete. It’s those hard times when you realize who is really there to help, no matter what the issue might be.

So here’s to all the great people in my life that have showed me that sometimes change is needed in order to discover yourself. Life should be shared with the people that lift your spirits. I’m thankful for the amount of love that I’m surrounded by, and the amount that I’m able to give back. Allow yourself to learn and grow, and make sure you’re doing it alongside the ones who have always stayed true. Once you find those people, never let them go. They’ve loved you through the good and the bad. They’re unique and that has shaped the person you’re growing up to be. We all have the choice to move on in life, but there’s a special reason why these people have stayed for so long.

-Caroline Abigail

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